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Anxiety's a B!tch!


Developing Responsible and Motivated Kids

Take Off Your Boxing Gloves & Enjoy Your Teen

Motivating Children – Part 1

Motivating Children – Part 2

All these are covered in more detail in my Podcast:


First step is to leave the location you are currently in, then move to another location, whether in your house, at work, on an errand. If possible, going outside is great! There is science around how this works. Next, in that new area take slow deep breaths and while you do, look at something in that environment, something very pleasing to you and concentrate on it in very, very tiny detail like your eyes is a microscope. Can’t find anything? Picture an image in your head. This could be a scene, a situation, an event, an experience that is the amazingly pleasurable for you.

The main thing to do is to be there for that person. With a soft, supportive voice and manner, encourage them to follow the steps I mentioned in #1. Coach them through the steps if they are having trouble accomplishing them. Comfort the person by encouraging them to talk about their feelings and/or what brought this on. But, don’t push or nag. Respect their feelings and don’t overdo your role.

The key to anxiety prevention is to avoid the triggers that make us anxious. But stress is part of life and we can’t completely keep all stress away. So, in general, follow a healthy lifestyle with plenty of healthy diversions to take your mind off stresses. Practicing mindfulness and regular meditation can do wonders. I must emphasize that regular exercise is a huge help in calming anxiety, as well as being physically healthy. Eating healthy and staying away from drugs are also good prevention. And, remember, alcohol and nicotine are drugs.

There are many possible causes to anxiety.  They can be physical-an abnormality in your body- or they can be triggered by situational or external events- and these can come from almost any life event, even positive ones. Don’t feel weak or ashamed because you have anxiety, we are long past the days of this being a stigma. Emotionally, the number one cause is the UNKNOWN.

Symptoms of panic attacks usually last between 5 to 20 minutes. So, know that this too shall pass. If a panic attack lasts longer than 20-30 minutes, seek professional help immediately.

If you don’t have some degree of performance anxiety before tests, reports, presentations etc. then you are either dead, narcissistic, sociopathic or zombie. Here are just a few quick tips to help calm you. 1- Practice and know your material inside out. 2- Visualize the situation-chances are you been in this situation before or something like it. 3- Put the performance in perspective. It will end in xyz minutes. 4- Control anything that will take away from your performance such as have any materials you need ready and in good working condition, don’t take drugs/alcohol, be early for the task, look your best and get plenty of rest before the performance.

If you have problems falling asleep, do the following. Keep a regular bedtime and wake-up time. Don’t eat/drink foods or take medications (or non-prescribed drugs for that matter) that can interfere with sleep. Get regular exercise and experiment on when is the best time in the day for you to exercise. Make your bedroom extremely comfortable and only use your bed for sleeping. Be clean and wear fresh bed clothes. A warm bath or shower before bed is relaxing. Finally, as your head hits the pillow create a wonderful dream fantasy in your head and enjoy these images.

Social anxiety can take many forms, from being around small gatherings of people to not being able to leave your house. The best methods we have to help with social anxiety is Exposure Therapy. And this is something you can help a loved one with or even do yourself. The formula is simple, take tiny, small steps toward doing a social activity. Ok, you might even say a term I hate, ‘Baby Steps.’ When you feel comfortable increase that step to a bigger one in the direction of accomplishing a social activity until you can actually participate in the social activity comfortably.

Continue to be safe. YOU need to feel safe based on the best information you can gather. Example, if you resume activities and you are the only person masking, so what? Be selfish here, don’t just follow the crowd. Return to your normal routine slowly and steadily. Make sure to also help people who are struggling.

The ultimate source of fear is one thing (drum roll): The Unknown. Any other thing that causes fear is an aspect of the unknown. Such examples as money problems, fear of the dark, fear of the dentist, doctor’s visits, job performance reviews, tests, applying for a job, strangers, all have at their root a fear of something unknown or outcomes that are unknown.

Anxiety is like placing a tax or an injury on the body and it can take many, many forms and I have seen unusual consequences of anxiety such as sore throats, vision problems, swelling in body parts as well as the more common physical symptoms of anxiety attacks such as chest pain, vomiting, shakes, headache, muscle tension, rapid heartbeat, and damage to the immune system. I must mention here that the opposite is also true. Good physical health wards off and prevents anxiety.